Journal excerpt.

January 4, 2009.

It's five in the morning, and I can't sleep. My mind is on fire with a million ideas I have to get out, and until then I won't be satisfied. I'm on the verge of exhaustion, but here's my best attempt at manipulating your vantage points with my opinions. Why do we concentrate on all of the small things in life? Why do we pour all of our time and energy into things that have no lasting significance? We obsess over outward technicalities and overlook the most important aspect of ourselves; our souls. I don't care what your argument is, but a troubled soul in a pair of jimmy chu's isn't any better off. We fixate our attention on expensive things, big bank accounts, and massive egos we can't feed. Shouldn't we be cashing our checks in a more profound way than purchasing all the traps and fittings to become some emotionally bullet-proof mannequin society? Who set our standards for beauty anyways? Who's right is it to tell us what we can perceive to be beautiful? Where have we gotten this notion that slim is better, blond is hotter, and in order to be happy we must waste our money on nip tucking our God-made perfect bodies? Shouldn't we be defining our own realities? Appearance is truly only skin deep, make-up can't do shit for your psyche. Skin withers, hair fades, and eyes slowly start to lose their twinkle. Maybe we slowly start to decay as we age as a way to remind us that what we've been slaving over won't follow us when we depart. Nothing is guaranteed, we may be gone tomorrow or the day after or the next. Life is too damn short to waste it on climbing up the totem pole of reputational success. This is your wake up call, answer it or don't. It's time we stepped out of this Hollywood persona and jump head first into a perpetual mindset. One day we'll all stand completely naked before the one judge who truly matters. We'll be bare with all of our faults and ugly demons that we ignored while we had the chance. Perfect figures will be irrelevant, and our true beauty will be on the block. Look past that face in the mirror and start focusing on the exquisiteness of your inner being, the true you.