It kills me everyday.

I wish I could take back everything I gave you.
And I can't, I really can't.
A million secrets and kisses down an impending drain.
You never cared.
Never.
It kills me everyday.

This is who I am.

And everytime I look myself in the eye,
I want to break through the crystal barrier,
Pick myself the most brilliant piece of irradescence,
And just bleed the monsters out.
Reach through the shades, and peel my skin.
Peel away this barricade I'm sheltered in.
Off like a shirt, over my head, off the shoulders.
Hair falls to the floor in heaps.
Features, bones, crumble, disappear altogether.
Slowly puddling on the floor,
Becoming something unrecognizable.
Falling apart until I'm absolutely nothing.
Invisible.
I am invisible.
I'm everything you've never seen.
Look at me and look through all you've ever known.
As broken as the shattered mirror,
That lies where my once visible feet stood.
I am insignificant.
I am proud.
No longer bound by these chains I bore.
I'm here now.
Outside of myself, I stand.
This is who I am.

Pressure.

Fingertips to temples.
Pressure.
Pressure.
Intensity increases.
Sanity decreases.
I can't take much more-
Pressure.
Pressure.

Until The End.

The kindergarteners I used to read Nancy Drew to are now
Doing more with their bodies than even I allow.
Eighth grade slut's moved onto better things, she's found a sense of worth now.
Life just keeps flying by, and I can't even start to comprehend exactly how
Time flies and yet I still feel as if I'm the same person I've always been.
I'll never change, I'll never change, until the end.
Raspberry Perfume's on repeat again, and just sitting here I can see
Myself walking down those halls again, so terrified to be
The odd one out.
To be the one without.
I really think those are the days I harbored more than I knew.
Big smiles hiding every pain that just burned me throughout, it was true
When I told you you'd be so surpised
To see what I saw behind my eyes.

The same still goes,
None of you really know
What it's like to be in this skin
I'll never change, I'll never change, until the end.