Please Just Listen.

I'd pretend I was asleep on the phone.
Just to hear you say my name over and over.
It sounded so good.
A part of me leaving you.

It's not seeing eye to eye when you won't look in mine.
I believed you when you said it's all I'm good for.
When I said, "Get your hands off of me."
I never meant put them on her.

Come home.
I can't even remember what you look like.
I never said goodbye.
You're just a blur repeating, "The responsibility's not mine."

I shouldn't have to see you and have you hug me,
Only to shove me against the wall and spit in my face.
You said they would help you.
But they didn't, not even a little bit.
The hits made you hit.

What were you thinking when you came home drunk?
I'd love to ask if I ever got the chance.
I tried to answer you.
I never got the chance.
I haven't tasted blood so thick in all of my life.

I didn't want you to hurt her.
"You can hurt me, I can take it."
The scars are gone now.
But they come back on days like this.

You said life wouldn't hurt.
But it did.
Bandages and bandages made of layers of bullshit.

And now I'm just a mess of messes.
Raising a sixteen year old on my own.
We play games.
But they're over when you don't come home.

I'm small, polite, and quiet.
Don't think twice about not saying hello.
It's not your fault for not knowing
How low I go when I go.